Funny poems for kids by Mark Megson

There’s an old saying

That the pen is

Mightier than the sword

But I’m more afraid

Of the white stuff

Underneath the written word

Now I’ve never had

A limb lopped off

Or felt a swift blade’s sting

But I know all too well

The pain that a well-placed

Paper cut can bring

So put away

Your pens and swords

And unsheathe your finest sheaf

For a battle not of wits

Or knightly fits

But of pain beyond belief!

An elephant who once got blind drunk

Stomped down to a yard full of junk

Where jars of old screws

Looked too much like booze

And he drank till that junk filled his trunk

Big T and the Piggies

Are a gang as tough as nails

Hairy and pink

They created a stink

And got themselves thrown in jail

Inside a one foot prison cell

Inside a cotton cage

Bound in leather

And tied with a knot

They were sentenced to sweat for an age

But now they’re free

They’re going to market

To fight a rival gang

On the mean streets

A pair of mean feet

Where Big T and the Piggies hang.