Funny Poems, Short Stories and Animation
The paintball wars
As they were called
Became a lot of fun
And it all started
When the White House was still white
In two-thousand, one-hundred and sixty one
Modern Warfare had become a pest
So the world had laid its guns to rest
But war would still go on
And it was decided that the only way
Was to make it safe and fun
Paintball guns were made
Of every size and grade
Ones that fired pellets and balls
And ones that squirted and sprayed
But the General confessed
That to judge the contest
The military were not the ones qualified best
So they called on the experts of canvas and paint
Who never before did the stench of war taint
Emma Mulsion was called
James Gloss and Mike Satin
All artists and they thought
That it wasn't quite fun, war or art
So they called it -
Fwarting
Fwart warfare it began to evolve
And with a paintball bomb
A problem was solved
As big as the sun?
As big as the moon?
How big you will see,
And you will see soon
No more men would be shot
Or with paint splattered
But whole cities would be covered
And that was what mattered
London, New York and Berlin
Was where the bombing would begin
Giant blimps that carried balloons
Over oceans were floated
Ready to pop
And to be exploded
But every country
Had their own colour
And soon a palette was made
A rainbow of colours
Of numerous colours
Was floating there on display
On a command
The paint that was dammed
Would soon flood over the city
For dry cleaners everywhere
And anyone on washing day
It would be quite a pity
And so they were dropped
The balloons they fell
They popped
Many have said “lets paint the town red”
And never was this more true
But more than that did they paint the town
With every colour from orange to blue
Of course the paint got mixed in places
Giving everyone, everywhere, multi-coloured faces
Mystified, everyone was dyed
From their feet up to their eyes
And though they tried to have the paint removed
They soon found out a point was proved
The artists could not distinguish
One race from another
Daughter from mother
Or sister from brother
Covered in paint the world looked fair
But you couldn't tell who was from where
And in the end no one was sure
What it was they had been fighting for.
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